I’m all for giving every eligible man a chance when it comes to dating because realistically you have no idea who will be your potential mate for life. However should it not be just a common courtesy and common sense that if you don’t have the capability to date, entertain, or even have a job that you should probably take yourself out of the game until you get in a better position. I’m not speaking of college kids who would still live at home but grown people in their “dirty thirties”.
I met a nice gentleman on a temporary assignment I was on and exchanged contact info. After the assignment ended we chatted on the phone and started to get to know each other. I decided after a week of phone calls that no we couldn’t date and just be friends and was open and honest enough to say so BUT of course as luck would have it he wanted to revisit the topic of me dating him, which I reminded him that we had already discussed that. I don’t know how or when I’m going to find my mister right but I’m sure it wont be a gentleman who lived with his parents for the past three years, with no car, no cell phone (not required), no private phone line, and no steady job except for a temp assignment a few times a year. I would rather date someone who works for dumpster rental Pomona, ca, with decent job, has own car, who is independent and responsible enough to shoulder responsibilities and to pay bills. I’m not into looks. I would always consider a established man over some lazy ass men.
What’s wrong with sitting out the game and focusing on yourself? I’ve done it, I’ve watched relatives and friends do it and speak on the issue of not dating due to their situation. It just doesn’t matter how nice you are but since I “date”, meaning I go out on outing and don’t have men come through my pad until I know them quite well. I just can’t see dating someone who doesn’t have the ability or means to date. I’d always have to drive, wait for the phone call ’cause I’ll be damned If I call your house and ask a grown mans parents can I speak to you. I’d feel guilty if you spent a dollar because honestly you’ve got no job. It’s just a sad situation and really looks like someone wants to be taken care of and rescued. Luckily I’m smart enough to not be the one. No, I’ve got no steady job but I keep my own apartment, car, home phone, cell phone (a simple luxury), high speed internet (because you could almost die without it), and let me tell you it’s a constant hustle to keep it all going and at the same time continue to try to get ahead by obtaining an advanced degree to put me in the position for an opportunity when it arises. So at the minimum in order for me to consider to date anyone who is less the wealthy I demand that you have to be supporting yourself or hustling your behind every day try to leave your bad situation behind because calling me at noon saying “I guess I should get out the bed now”, speaks volumes about how serious you take you life.